Developing a real problem solving mindset requires something counterintuitive. You have to feel your frustration before you can see the solution.
I got a flat tire today, out in the middle of the country with nothing around me. I did not have a spare tire in the car. I did not know what I was going to do. I was frustrated.
But I had the peace of mind to just sit with that frustration and anger and let it burn its way out of me.
Then I Looked Up
And just down the road was an old house with a sign that read: “We fix flats.”
And they did. And now I am back on the road and all is well.
But when the blowout first happened, I had looked all around me and could not figure out what I was going to do. My frustration blinded me. I pulled off the road, cursing, and could not see a solution.
Until I quieted my mind. Felt what I was feeling. And stopped projecting my fear of not finding a solution as anger and frustration.
Then I could see.
Did I Invent the Sign?
Was that sign always there, or did I invent it by shifting my state of being? Or a little of both.
So often, we can not see what is right in front of us.
This is the hidden key to a problem solving mindset. It is not about thinking harder. It is not about generating more options. It is about clearing the emotional static that blocks your perception in the first place.
The Question Worth Asking
What are you frustrated, angry, or enraged about in your life? Have you taken the time to really feel those feelings? To let them burn through your nervous system until they dissipate?
Or do you just deflect those feelings by projecting that rage onto others?
Is your frustration about anything preventing you from seeing the obvious?
These are not rhetorical questions. They are diagnostic ones. Your relationship to frustration directly shapes your ability to perceive solutions. The more you resist the feeling, the more it clouds your vision.
How This Works in Practice
Next time you hit a wall, try this. Stop trying to solve the problem for five minutes. Instead, notice what you are feeling. Name it. Let it be there without fixing it or pushing it away.
Breathe into the discomfort. Let the frustration move through you instead of controlling you. Watch how your perception shifts when the emotional charge dissipates.
The solutions do not arrive because you thought your way to them. They arrive because you cleared the filter that was blocking your sight.
The Solutions Are Always There
The solutions are always there. We just have to have the right kind of eyes. Then we can see the signs everywhere.
This is shadow work in action.
If your frustration is blinding you to solutions, the answer is not to think harder. It is to feel first. Explore the Shadow Work practices.