Overcoming perfectionism starts with a counterintuitive realization: your mistakes might actually become your style.
Singer-songwriter John Prine put it perfectly: “As far as guitar picking, if I make the same mistakes at the same time every day, people will start calling it a style.”
The Pumpkin Problem
An artist was tasked with carving pumpkins for an event. As he presented each one, the committee gave feedback. One was too scary. Another too silly. Another too indie.
Wanting to incorporate everyone’s feedback, he kept revising. By the end, he’d created a pumpkin with nothing of himself in it. Generic. Forgettable. Something that wouldn’t offend anyone but also wouldn’t inspire anyone.
The artist didn’t enjoy the final product. And worse, the flame of his original vision had completely gone out.
Why Feedback Too Early Kills Creativity
When you’re still shaky in your vision, outside opinions can obliterate it. You haven’t built enough confidence in what you’re creating to know which feedback to take and which to ignore.
The corporate world is full of projects that got “designed by committee” into blandness. Every edge filed off. Every unique element removed. The safest possible version of an idea.
You don’t want that. You want people around you who can see where you’re going, not just where you are.
Making Your Process the Art
Your process is the art. The final product is just a snapshot of a moment in time.
If you’re not enjoying the process, you’re doing it wrong. Make having fun the priority. When fun comes first, the pressure of perfection falls away.
Paradoxically, this is when you’re most likely to create something great. Because you’ve released all the resistance.
When to Ask for Feedback
Wait until you’re solid in your vision. Until you know what you’re building well enough that criticism feels like data rather than a knife.
Then use feedback as an option, not an obligation. Something on the salad bar you could choose. Not a command you have to obey.
Sit with feedback that stings. Feel it in your body. Let it transmute. Then ask yourself: what would I have preferred to hear? That preference is data too.
This is shadow work in action.
If you’re ready to process what’s been running your life, explore the Shadow Work practices.
The Lurkers Who Matter
Here’s something I learned in sales: the people most likely to become your best clients don’t comment or like your content. They lurk.
They’re watching, waiting until they’re ready to engage at a high level. Then they show up ready to invest serious money, having followed you for months or years without ever saying a word.
You don’t need everyone to love your work. You need the right people to find it. And they will, if you’re creating something real instead of something designed to offend no one.
The Takeaway
Overcoming perfectionism isn’t about accepting mediocrity. It’s about recognizing that the unique way you do things, including your “mistakes,” is what makes your work yours.
Find ways to enjoy your process. Create before you’re ready. Let your imperfections become your signature.
The people who matter will call it style.